I like your second point.

But on your first point, I would say women are not a monolith. Even if she's heterosexual, she can be feminine, neutral or masculine. Like the guy in your example is 'feminine'. Just because he is a heterosexual man, it's not a given he's 'masculine'; the same goes for women. But I agree, it's hard to beat biology ingrained in us over millennia.

Men are not 'toxic'; that's not what modernity says. A form of masculinity can be toxic and restrictive that negatively affects men.